The #1 training exercise for horsemen,?

Rose ofintrigue · 07-04-2009, 10:59 AM

10. Drop a heavy steel object on your foot. Don't pick it up right away. Shout, "Get off, Stupid, GET > > OFF!"

9. Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice "relaxing into the fall." Roll lithely into a ball and spring to your feet.

8. Learn to grab your checkbook and write out a $200 check without even looking down.

7. Jog long distances carrying a halter and a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbors what you are doing - they might as well know now.

6. Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train ,.. and practice pulling to a halt. Smile as if you are > > having fun.

5. Hone your fibbing skills: "See hon, moving hay bales is FUN!" .

4. Practice dialing your chiropractor?s number with both arms paralyzed to shoulder .

3. Borrow the US Army's slogan: Be All That You Can Be -- bitten, thrown, kicked, slimed, trampled,

2. Lie face down in a puddle of mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself, > > "This is a learning experience, this is a learning experience, this is ..."

Can anyone add the #one?.......ps. all in fun!!!

RansomRokz · 07-04-2009, 03:07 PM

Hahah I remember reading this a long time ago. Still funny!
And of course...
THE NUMBER ONE EXERCISE TO BECOME A BETTER EQUESTRIAN: Marry money.

SaddleUp158 · 07-04-2009, 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RansomRokz

Hahah I remember reading this a long time ago. Still funny!
And of course...
THE NUMBER ONE EXERCISE TO BECOME A BETTER EQUESTRIAN: Marry money.

Hey if someone can tell me how to do this I will go out and do it tomorrow! lol I need an indoor arena!

LindaMM · 07-04-2009, 05:53 PM

How about getting all dressed up in formal clothes - think top hat and tails, then ask three of your best friends to sneeze goobers all over you.

Rose ofintrigue · 07-05-2009, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SaddleUp158

Hey if someone can tell me how to do this I will go out and do it tomorrow! lol I need an indoor arena!

Hello, it's true,.. "nothing we can sing that aint been sung", sure takes plenty of money.

Rose ofintrigue · 07-05-2009, 09:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lindammorris

How about getting all dressed up in formal clothes - think top hat and tails, then ask three of your best friends to sneeze goobers all over you.

If dressed like that, wouldn't have to ask, all mine would oblige..

MoonlightsWildPassion · 07-05-2009, 10:19 AM

My favorite was when I was in private school, black pants, white shirt and tie (females had the option of a skirt). I used to go feed teh horses before school and ROUTINELY one would snot allover me, and the light colorado horses would decided that my pants were an excellent rubbing post... My teachers got used to see that.

Sooooo go dress upin nice slacks,white shirt,and see the ponies...

greyongray · 07-05-2009, 02:57 PM

Quote:

Smile as if you are > > having fun.

Ahh these are all hilarious, WOW funniest thing all day!

FleetFeet · 07-05-2009, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RansomRokz

Hahah I remember reading this a long time ago. Still funny!
And of course...
THE NUMBER ONE EXERCISE TO BECOME A BETTER EQUESTRIAN: Marry money.

hahahaha...so sadly true.

Where is my sugar daddy at? Elly needs a new friend

I'm thinking a nice sport pony...

07-04-2009, 05:53 PM	#4
LindaMM Senior Member+ Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Gilbert, AZ Posts: 1,395 Images: 121 Blog Entries: 2	How about getting all dressed up in formal clothes - think top hat and tails, then ask three of your best friends to sneeze goobers all over you. __________________ If the world was truly a rational place, men would ride sidesaddle. ~Rita Mae Brown If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. -Abraham Maslow

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07-04-2009, 10:59 AM	#1
Rose ofintrigue Full Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 71	The #1 training exercise for horsemen,? 10. Drop a heavy steel object on your foot. Don't pick it up right away. Shout, "Get off, Stupid, GET > > OFF!" 9. Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice "relaxing into the fall." Roll lithely into a ball and spring to your feet. 8. Learn to grab your checkbook and write out a $200 check without even looking down. 7. Jog long distances carrying a halter and a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbors what you are doing - they might as well know now. 6. Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train ,.. and practice pulling to a halt. Smile as if you are > > having fun. 5. Hone your fibbing skills: "See hon, moving hay bales is FUN!" . 4. Practice dialing your chiropractor?s number with both arms paralyzed to shoulder . 3. Borrow the US Army's slogan: Be All That You Can Be -- bitten, thrown, kicked, slimed, trampled, 2. Lie face down in a puddle of mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself, > > "This is a learning experience, this is a learning experience, this is ..." Can anyone add the #one?.......ps. all in fun!!! Last edited by Rose ofintrigue; 07-04-2009 at 11:45 AM.

07-04-2009, 03:07 PM	#2
RansomRokz Full Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: On the back of a horse Posts: 83	Hahah I remember reading this a long time ago. Still funny! And of course... THE NUMBER ONE EXERCISE TO BECOME A BETTER EQUESTRIAN: Marry money.