Rearing question

pippy · 11-02-2009, 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by farmeress

Show him this thread

tehehehe...

In your situation I would do one of a few things after letting him read this thread
A) ask him if he can see why you want to go in another direction with the filly and that he would consider it if *I* did the research to find the trainer and get his approval - if not *I'll* find another one unti he approves.

B) wipe your hands, keep the peace in your marrige, nod and smile, let hubby do as he pleases with the filly, tell him your going to buy your own and do it my way with the new filly and see who comes out better off (but thats just my competitive nature coming out)

C) find another trainer, get her to work with the filly at current barn and make it seem like hubby's idea, let him see how much better she comes along with a different trainer and then POUNCE on him to send her with said trainer for the 60 days training.

cornhuskergirl · 11-02-2009, 06:39 PM

My hubby is currently flipping through the thread that I printed out for him ... fingers crossed!

Alliekk · 11-02-2009, 07:04 PM

I agree with Farmeress. show him this thread, tell him that the consensus is NOT what he is thinking. When not one or two, but SEVERAL people agree with a training technique, there might be something to it. Just because some block-head can afford a stable does NOT mean he has the credentials to train a horse like this. Where are you located?

cornhuskergirl · 11-02-2009, 07:30 PM

We are in Nebraska and although I really like it here (had been abroad for the last 10 years), I think the location contributes to some degree. Lots of people have the old "cowboy" mentality. And then it gets mixed in with Parelli -- since that is still the "bees' knees" here -- and it is an awful combination.

I have decided to follow Pippy's plan b course of action <<B) wipe your hands, keep the peace in your marrige, nod and smile, let hubby do as he pleases with the filly, tell him your going to buy your own and do it my way with the new filly and see who comes out better off (but thats just my competitive nature coming out>>. Since my husband says (even after reading the thread( that he trusts the BO, that he (the BO) has been around horseys a long time ...

I guess I will just cross my fingers and say a prayer every time he goes out to the barn. I would rather that my baby still have his daddy around for his 1st b-day party

Alliekk · 11-02-2009, 11:18 PM

what a sad day for the poor filly. She's been let down so many times. The BO is going to get him, or someone else killed! I can see where this filly will end up: in a feed lot, with so many other mis-handled horses. So sorry you had to make this decision, I know how headstrong men can be, but WOW!!! Will you bee looking in on any of these ''training sessions?'' If you do, PLEASE keep us updated. Take some videos. A trainer is not a true trainer if they are not open to new methods. I use the term ''trainer'' in this post EXTREMELY lightly given the video I've seen. He is too rough and inconsistent/negligent. How much does this ''trainer'' think he's going to charge you for ruining your filly? I sure as helll hope it's no more than monthly board. There will be some medical bills you are going to be loking at soon enough because of him, I sure hope he doesn't suck you dry before it happens. One day this filly IS going to realize that she is a LOT bigger than you guys and is going to take advantage while she can.

sad day

tlwidener · 11-02-2009, 11:33 PM

Wow, good luck. The BO looks like more of a doofus than the filly. It might benefit this filly to be turned out on pasture for awhile to let her grow up some. If she's that nasty to other horses it may benefit her to be put in with some broodmares that know their places. Sounds like the filly has a pretty high opinion of herself and needs a reality check.

I'd be looking for new living situation and a new trainer.

cornhuskergirl · 11-02-2009, 11:54 PM

I am uber frustrated with the situation and I spent several hours tonight crying. What makes it even more frustrating is that I have found a beautiful barn on the other side of the city, where I am keeping a filly that I currently have on a 30-day trial. It is a night and day difference, with numerous competent and highly professional trainers to choose from. And on top of that, cheaper! And my hubby refused because he said that he did not want to create a "stink" and because he would have to clean out his stall at the new place (I even tried to bribe him telling him that I would muck it every single day!) ... I also gave him the option of turning her out for the winter and hoping that she will grow up more mature or at least more willing to come in and work for the winter. And hopefully getting taught her place. I agree with you guys that she definitely has a high opinion of herself.

I plan on trying to get some videos of these little training "escapades." Because I am highly skeptical. But, I am also persona non grata (or close) to at the barn because I have stated my opinions more than a few times. And I will also try and shoot some video tomorrow of the experience with the farrier (although that will mean having to set my alarm).

Brokenhearted does not even begin to describe how I feel about the situation with the filly. And I wish that I had put my foot down when I had my checkbook in hand and insisted that my hubby get a dead broke horse, since he neither has the time or the patience for the filly and her "issues." ... I just feel so terribly guilty

cornhuskergirl · 11-03-2009, 12:03 AM

Of course, I do not want anything to happen to my husband (who I LOVE despite his stubborn streak) ... But, I am also worried that the baby is going to hurt herself. She tried to rear in the cross ties once with my husband (unfortunately, I was far away in the lounge with the baby so not near enough to intervene). And she wacked her head off of the ceiling and I could hear him (the trainer) saying that she will learn her lesson. Personally, I don't get this "Parelli" philosophy that it is oh so bad if I pop her in the shoulder or across the nose if she bites (because a physical response to the horse is not appropriate), but letting herself wack herself off the ceiling is okay???

I guess my prayers have now been amended -- the filly first, since she is the innocent creature in the situation!

jedy · 11-03-2009, 02:47 AM

It doesn't enter my head that when a horse stands on her back legs, pawing at handlers head, hubby thinks she has the teeny weeny rspect issues with women!
Hubby- when I see that I bluntly refuse dealing with such a horse. And so does my husband, NOT BEFORE he got stroke in head twice within one month. He's an experienced horse handler, dealt with many, many half wild horses. The strikes were as fast as lightening, impossible to avoid. This level of agression we'll not deal with anymore. We don't want to. Amen.

Alliekk · 11-03-2009, 09:33 AM

Why is he being so pig-headed? Seariously? He is worried about his own appearance over his filly's well-being? She is NOT a piece of machinery that he can just dump if he f*ucks it up! She is a living, breathing animal, buch like a human child. Does he disagree with swatting a kid if they openly act out aggression towards another? The difference is HUMANS CAN TALK, so he needs to learn to talk HORSE, which is NOT Parelli/cowboy. I'll say it again, poor filly!

11-02-2009, 11:33 PM	#36
tlwidener Senior Member+ Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Colorado Posts: 2,768 Images: 146	Wow, good luck. The BO looks like more of a doofus than the filly. It might benefit this filly to be turned out on pasture for awhile to let her grow up some. If she's that nasty to other horses it may benefit her to be put in with some broodmares that know their places. Sounds like the filly has a pretty high opinion of herself and needs a reality check. I'd be looking for new living situation and a new trainer. __________________ Does this saddle make my butt look big? It's MINE! GIVE IT BACK NOW!!!

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11-02-2009, 06:39 PM	#32
cornhuskergirl Full Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Nebraska Posts: 330 Images: 15	My hubby is currently flipping through the thread that I printed out for him ... fingers crossed!

11-02-2009, 07:04 PM	#33
Alliekk Senior Member+ Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Eugene, Oregon Posts: 1,423 Images: 153	I agree with Farmeress. show him this thread, tell him that the consensus is NOT what he is thinking. When not one or two, but SEVERAL people agree with a training technique, there might be something to it. Just because some block-head can afford a stable does NOT mean he has the credentials to train a horse like this. Where are you located?

11-02-2009, 07:30 PM	#34
cornhuskergirl Full Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Nebraska Posts: 330 Images: 15	We are in Nebraska and although I really like it here (had been abroad for the last 10 years), I think the location contributes to some degree. Lots of people have the old "cowboy" mentality. And then it gets mixed in with Parelli -- since that is still the "bees' knees" here -- and it is an awful combination. I have decided to follow Pippy's plan b course of action <<B) wipe your hands, keep the peace in your marrige, nod and smile, let hubby do as he pleases with the filly, tell him your going to buy your own and do it my way with the new filly and see who comes out better off (but thats just my competitive nature coming out>>. Since my husband says (even after reading the thread( that he trusts the BO, that he (the BO) has been around horseys a long time ... I guess I will just cross my fingers and say a prayer every time he goes out to the barn. I would rather that my baby still have his daddy around for his 1st b-day party

11-02-2009, 11:18 PM	#35
Alliekk Senior Member+ Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Eugene, Oregon Posts: 1,423 Images: 153	what a sad day for the poor filly. She's been let down so many times. The BO is going to get him, or someone else killed! I can see where this filly will end up: in a feed lot, with so many other mis-handled horses. So sorry you had to make this decision, I know how headstrong men can be, but WOW!!! Will you bee looking in on any of these ''training sessions?'' If you do, PLEASE keep us updated. Take some videos. A trainer is not a true trainer if they are not open to new methods. I use the term ''trainer'' in this post EXTREMELY lightly given the video I've seen. He is too rough and inconsistent/negligent. How much does this ''trainer'' think he's going to charge you for ruining your filly? I sure as helll hope it's no more than monthly board. There will be some medical bills you are going to be loking at soon enough because of him, I sure hope he doesn't suck you dry before it happens. One day this filly IS going to realize that she is a LOT bigger than you guys and is going to take advantage while she can. sad day

11-02-2009, 11:54 PM	#37
cornhuskergirl Full Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Nebraska Posts: 330 Images: 15	I am uber frustrated with the situation and I spent several hours tonight crying. What makes it even more frustrating is that I have found a beautiful barn on the other side of the city, where I am keeping a filly that I currently have on a 30-day trial. It is a night and day difference, with numerous competent and highly professional trainers to choose from. And on top of that, cheaper! And my hubby refused because he said that he did not want to create a "stink" and because he would have to clean out his stall at the new place (I even tried to bribe him telling him that I would muck it every single day!) ... I also gave him the option of turning her out for the winter and hoping that she will grow up more mature or at least more willing to come in and work for the winter. And hopefully getting taught her place. I agree with you guys that she definitely has a high opinion of herself. I plan on trying to get some videos of these little training "escapades." Because I am highly skeptical. But, I am also persona non grata (or close) to at the barn because I have stated my opinions more than a few times. And I will also try and shoot some video tomorrow of the experience with the farrier (although that will mean having to set my alarm). Brokenhearted does not even begin to describe how I feel about the situation with the filly. And I wish that I had put my foot down when I had my checkbook in hand and insisted that my hubby get a dead broke horse, since he neither has the time or the patience for the filly and her "issues." ... I just feel so terribly guilty

11-03-2009, 12:03 AM	#38
cornhuskergirl Full Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Nebraska Posts: 330 Images: 15	Of course, I do not want anything to happen to my husband (who I LOVE despite his stubborn streak) ... But, I am also worried that the baby is going to hurt herself. She tried to rear in the cross ties once with my husband (unfortunately, I was far away in the lounge with the baby so not near enough to intervene). And she wacked her head off of the ceiling and I could hear him (the trainer) saying that she will learn her lesson. Personally, I don't get this "Parelli" philosophy that it is oh so bad if I pop her in the shoulder or across the nose if she bites (because a physical response to the horse is not appropriate), but letting herself wack herself off the ceiling is okay??? I guess my prayers have now been amended -- the filly first, since she is the innocent creature in the situation!

11-03-2009, 02:47 AM	#39
jedy Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Ireland Posts: 1,527 Images: 48	It doesn't enter my head that when a horse stands on her back legs, pawing at handlers head, hubby thinks she has the teeny weeny rspect issues with *women!* Hubby- when I see that I bluntly refuse dealing with such a horse. And so does my husband, NOT BEFORE he got stroke in head twice within one month. He's an experienced horse handler, dealt with many, many half wild horses. The strikes were as fast as lightening, impossible to avoid. This level of agression we'll not deal with anymore. We don't want to. Amen.

11-03-2009, 09:33 AM	#40
Alliekk Senior Member+ Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Eugene, Oregon Posts: 1,423 Images: 153	Why is he being so pig-headed? Seariously? He is worried about his own appearance over his filly's well-being? She is NOT a piece of machinery that he can just dump if he f*ucks it up! She is a living, breathing animal, buch like a human child. Does he disagree with swatting a kid if they openly act out aggression towards another? The difference is HUMANS CAN TALK, so he needs to learn to talk HORSE, which is NOT Parelli/cowboy. I'll say it again, poor filly!