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Discuss Letter from a farm kid *hilarious* at the Off Topic forum - Other Topics.

Saw this today on Tack of the Day and HAD to share...I was smirking until ...
  1. #1
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    Talking Letter from a farm kid *hilarious*

    Saw this today on Tack of the Day and HAD to share...I was smirking until the end, then I busted up

    Dear Ma and Pa,

    I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine
    Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick
    before all of the places are filled.

    I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m.
    but I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before
    breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed
    to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.

    Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water. Breakfast is
    strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak
    on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food,
    but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live on
    coffee. Their food plus yours holds you until noon when you get fed again.
    It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.

    We go on "route marches," which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to
    harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A "route
    march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get
    sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

    The country is nice but awful flat The sergeant is like a school teacher. He
    nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just
    ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

    This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for
    shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head
    and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home.
    All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load
    your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

    Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle
    with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy.
    It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they
    got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake I only beat
    him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds
    and he's 6'8" and near 300 pounds dry.

    Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get
    onto this setup and come stampeding in.

    Your loving daughter,

    Alice
    Feliche*Andre
    Quote Originally Posted by Roleysnewmom View Post
    So this gross diet coke tastes like gross diet coke with a splash of orange tang. And I'm still drinking it, because I'll be darned if I was robbed out of having a soda to drink when I went against my better judgement and got one!

  2. #2
    Senior Member+ Eeyore95_99's Avatar
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    That's cute! thanks for sharing!


    In loving memory of Duke, 2004-April 2, 2009 Scout, 1990- May 6, 2010.
    Proud member of the Curvy Women's riding club!
    Join the HGS prayer Chain!

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    That's great!!
    ~Becca <3 Riley!
    Feed your faith and your fears will starve to death.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rant View Post
    He's a very fancy giraffe.


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    Great letter.
    Now,
    put on your big girl panties and get over yourself!



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    Senior Member+ luckydragon's Avatar
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    Love it! That's great!!
    "Crazy TB Lady"
    Dragon Fly Thoroughbreds
    DFT on FB dfthoroughbreds.weebly.com

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    The loving daughter got me, thought it was cute until I realized it was written by a girl!
    Quote Originally Posted by Super Step View Post
    kofmele is the one you guys need to watch out for. You guys do not stand a chance.
    Painted Rocket to Parked Out: ... but you're the RIGHT kind of creepy!

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    Senior Member+ MysticsAbi's Avatar
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    Lol Thats pretty funny, Im pretty sure Ive seen different versions of this around...but still funny!

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    I love that letter!
    The two toughest things in life are failure and success.

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    Senior Member DixiesAngel26's Avatar
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    lol.

    I love it!
    You can walk the walk, and talk the talk; but can you ride the hide?


    We have three kinds of family.
    Those we are born to,
    Those who are born to us,
    And those we let into our hearts.
    -Simi

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    HA! I didn't expect that last bit! That's hilarious!
    Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate
    Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure
    It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us...

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