Adventures of PaintedRocket

I dont want to admit that I'm happy because then in turn, it feels/sounds like I'm admitting that I was unhappy in my relationship with Chris. Maybe I was deep down and just haven't realized it yet. I don't know.

But today.. I've done a lot of thinking and I feel like this is a GOOD decision. Usually, when I make a mistake or a bad choice, I will have a horrible gut wrenching feeling in my belly.. that is my intuition. However, I don't feel that way. I feel.. GOOD. Happy! ME!! I'm...

PaintedRocket

Why does doing the right thing hurt so bad?

I'm so glad I have tomorrow off to try and relax my brain and thoughts... I don't think I'd be able to concentrate on my work. What kills me the most, is that I hurt someone. I broke someone's heart. I've been on the receiving end and thought I'd just die. And now I've done it to someone else... what goes around, eh?

There is just no "easy" way about anything in this kind of situation. I love Christopher and it would...

PaintedRocket

I don't know if it's just me and THAT time of the month..

There is so much on my mind, I don't know if I'll be able to write it all. Some few friends here know about my past [relationship], know what all went down or at least some.. and have their opinions on it.

I just feel like I don't know what the he.ll I'm doing. I feel like I'm just doing everything wrong. At work, sometimes, and even more so now in my relationship. I'm doubting myself more and more... Chris treats...

PaintedRocket

So, while I was driving out to see snot faced baby.. I was thinking.

I really haven't been fair to Christopher. I have been a bad "instructor." Instead of taking the time to teach him about horse care and how to do things like brushing, why I put hooflex on her hooves, wound care... I just do it myself so I don't have to bother with it.

That isn't very nice, truthfully. I hadn't realized that I was doing this.. but it just came to me that I was. And I feel...

PaintedRocket

After calling around the feed stores in my area I am accustomed to. They all ONLY sell Purina

WELL.. On the Triple Crown website, I found a dealer that isn't too much farther from me! *dances* I dont mind driving the extra distance to buy better quality grain for my youngin'.. I'm SOOO happy! I'm going to pick up two bags this afternoon. They don't have 10% or 14% in stock, but I'm not sure if I should go with the Growth or Light forumula.. both are fine for growing horses....

PaintedRocket