The Thoughts of a Teenage Girl

I really don't know how to feel right now.

I guess I am sort of in a state of shock.

After trying to make myself believe so many things, I finally realize

they aren't true in, one moment, two words.

Its interesting really, after I pondered it for awhile.

At first I was angry then I thought; am I being selfish again?

I'm still in amazment though.

After everything that has been done, said and shared.

I guess I am not worthy enough anymore or something,

Yes I finally got enough courage to cut my hair.

I decided it would be a good idea after a friend of mine was sitting

behind me in class and told me I had lots of split ends.

So I had a look and sadly enough she was right.

My hair was pretty much a disaster.

So after school we ventured off to the mall and get our hair done.

I am trying to grow it out so I was very skeptical.

The lady did a good job, she did what I asked.

The layers are a bit short

Well I seem to have a dilema.

I've been thinking about it alot latley actually,

but today it went to a new level.

I've been working more than usual and finding time for Steeler is getting more and

more difficult.

Especially with my loads of homework too.

Most days I have to get someone else in my family to

feed him. It's just not fair for him.

When I do get time to spend with him, its always very enjoyable and we get

along great.

So

I feel so alone.

lol

Well not actually, its just that for the first time in decades I am home on a Friday night.

Its sort of depressing to me.

I had my first day of work today until 9:30.

So I quickly rush home and phone my boyfriend(Joel)

Turns out he is at a hockey game, so is busy.

Erica is at a soccer tournament.

So that leaves me sitting here behind the computer all alone.

I guess I should get used to it.

I'm a working girl now and

I forgot how much I love bareback riding.

It is so amazing.

At times you feel like you are one with the horse.

We have a grassy field thats about 40 acres.

It was sunny and a bit of a wind.

I threw on Steeler's halter and lead rope and jumped up.

We took off in the field for about 15 minutes.

It was awesome, actually quite hard to explain.

I advice everyone to take a quick run bareback on their horse.

It feels so good to be so close to them,