[Friesiangirl]

Rawr. This is a rant. You are warned.

Self pity time:

I seem to work and work and then I just mess up more. It's like being in an avalanche, and digging the wrong direction and just getting deeper and deeper.

It's one thing after another! Grr. My position, my heart, my guts, are all draining. I used to be FEARLESS but now I look at novice jumps and I'm scared out of my mind. I'm afraid to jump 2' 6'' with stormy. I don't even know why. He is a good hearted jumper. He doesn't rush, and rarely ducks. Nor does he throw a hard to sit jump. Smooth sailing on him.

Then I relised that he isn't even a good jumper nor am I good rider. SO back to flat work for us. Then all my friends are jumping and i'm doing walk/trot/walk/trot 1/4 circles, etc. While they alll are giggling and having a great time.

They keep saying, to me, "Hey future rolex winners, get out here and jump" and I simply tell them no, and give why.

They say I'm awesome but when I look at pictures all I see is imperfection.

This is my best picture of me riding. I'm tipped foward to get my leg back, but then I hollow my back, stick my elbows out, and get piano hands. I suck. Don't even get me started on stormy.


My toes are out, i'm not folding at my hips, my back is too arched, and stormy has discusting knees.



I see my flaws yet I have no self control to fix them. None. I try, but then I go back to bad habits.

I WANT to not be afraid, and have confidence. I want to have good eq. I want to be a GOOD rider. I don't want to be a pile of potatoes

I get so envious of all the amazing riders on here. They seem talented behond belief. I however am not. 2 years of hard work and where am I? Nowhere. And I can't even afford help.

[NotFadeAway]

Fixing bad habits is a rough thing for everything rider. Its so hard to do because your habits feel natural and right even tho they arent.

I take lessons and my intructors yells at me about what to fix etc. Could you get a horse savvy friend who can watch you and try to help you with your flaws.

I do not think you are a horrible rider. If I had a dollar for the amount of times I thought I was I'd be rich.

[Friesiangirl]

No, they all think it's pointless. And none of them are supportive. I once said, my eq is really horible, and my friend said, "well duh...?"

I was pretty chrushed. Apparently if you can't afford lessons you aren't worth the time of day.

Riding is hard for me. Gymnastics just came so EASY! As a 7 year old I could do things the big girls could. All the hard tumbling passes both on floor and beam. But jumping 3'? Oooh scary. Keeping my leg under my hip (Wow, thats a really hard concept :rollseyes just doens't come easy. Nor does not hollowing my back as I stand with my back hollowed.

[RowdyRio1324]

It's hard to fix bad habits.
Keep trying , you'll master them.

Im not an english person, so I don't know what to look for in the rider's eq.

[Madamoiselle]

Everyone gets down on their riding. You have generally good EQ-I think 99 percent of hunter riders including myself hollow out like that, it's a flaw, and I'm working on it, but everything is aligned there. In the jumping picture it looks like alot of your problems are stemming from your stirrup length and saddle which is making you insecure and weakening your entire base which in turns weakens your release-shorten up your stirrups for jumping and I bet your position will get sooo much better.

Stormy has such a round lovely jump, and his knees look like they good be an easy fix. Bounces, bounces, bounces! Fooling around with distances and grids(a line of three bounces with all oxers is not only SO much fun but is so beneficial to horse/rider for instance)-he's not as sloppy as most horses, and I bet some gridwork will fix it.

Seriously for that jumping pic, all you need to do is shorten your stirrups and lower your hands and deepen your heel.

In turn, if you're really determined then take your stirrups off your saddle for a month. Me and my friend took ours off and put them in the bottom of our tack trunks and didn't take them out for a while.

I'm not taking lessons right now either because I still have to arrange something with a trainer who's about 2 hours away-my friend can't afford lessons and she's doing great right now. Take lots of videos and we'll help point some things out to you in Critique!

[Friesiangirl]

Aww thanks everyone.

I took my stirrups off recently, but i'm afraid i'll fall. Oh well, i rarely fall off stormy and if he is to be my kids horse in the future, he'll have to learn it's okay for me to fall off. Lol

It's hard, but you guys make me feel much better. I'll work on myself. It's hard working on your self and your horse at teh same time

[aussie_jumper]

Hayley.. stop for a sec, this is a good thing because you are trying to fix your imperfections.. You want to be better and that is what counts.

Madamoiselle is right, shorten your stirrups and there won't be so many problems in your eq, Stormy is fine..

Don't listen to the people that having the time of their life because most of the time when the jumps get higher and the courses more difficult, you will be the one that can do the dressage/flatwork for the height. Flatwork counts for more than 50% of jumping and by doing lots of it you are helping both you and stormy.

Just keep up the good work... Do you have a trainer that you have lessons with regularly.. ? I do not know.

[Friesiangirl]

Originally Posted by aussie_jumper

Hayley.. stop for a sec, this is a good thing because you are trying to fix your imperfections.. You want to be better and that is what counts.

Madamoiselle is right, shorten your stirrups and there won't be so many problems in your eq, Stormy is fine..

Don't listen to the people that having the time of their life because most of the time when the jumps get higher and the courses more difficult, you will be the one that can do the dressage/flatwork for the height. Flatwork counts for more than 50% of jumping and by doing lots of it you are helping both you and stormy.

Just keep up the good work... Do you have a trainer that you have lessons with regularly.. ? I do not know.

No, i cannot afford it. Yet I have a trainer who is awesome, who wants to give me lessons. She sees potential in both me and stormy. She is trying to fit me in for working for her in exchange for lessons. She said next dressage show she takes a training horse to I can go with to help out.

I seem to collect fans, but I don't see why they like me so much.

I'm just so scared of height. I didn't used to be. Man, i'd throw stormy at anything. He'd jump it too. Now i'm so scared.

Oh, maybe because of my fall... *smacks head*. Stormy ducked out at a 3' (3'6''?) something along those lines, and I went head first threw the jump and his hoove was very close to stepping on my tummy. I have a scar to proove it too. His hoove drug with a lot of force across my tummy.

It's frustrating Lol

[HorseBliss]

i know how you feel. just keep workin (but don't beat yourself up so much!), and you'll get there. i've been havin a bad week and today i was wonder why i ride. i love it more than life itself, but i stink. i'm "fearless", but i can't seem to be able to do what i SHOULD be able to. so tomorrow when i ride, i'm goin out back, not gonna have a care in the world what my dang horse or myself look like, and just have fun!

and for the record, you do look really good (i do agree w/ the stirrup thing too)! like i said, don't beat yourself up, you're your own worst critic. and that's the hardest habit of all the break. take a day or 2 each week and go for a trail, go for a hack, do something to just have fun and not care what you and your horse look like. worry about that the next day.

i have a lot of the same problem you mentioned. they aren't easy to control, especially when you have to worry about how your horse is moving and tryin to get him to do somethin that he can't do. unfortunately, things take time, but you WILL get there. promise.

[Huntseat]

Don't you dare make me post some of MY... umm.. less than perfect pictures.. You have no idea.