[bay_blnd jmpr07]

So it turns out my grandpa(who is paralyzed from shoulders down) is dying...I don't know what's wrong really.

But I do know he is a jerk and so is his 2nd wife...his 2nd wife is actually a flaming witch whom I would LOVE to meet face to face to give her a piece of my mind(or all of it actually).

She is the reason I don't know what my grandfather looks like...I barely know his name! I couldn't remember his name yesterday...only my other grandfather who passed awhile back. She is the reason why my mother has no relationship with him.

She is a controlling witch who has some beef with my mom. WHY WOULD YOU EVERY MARY A MAN WITH 4 KIDS WHEN YOU DON'T LIKE THEM!!!!!!! Why?? 'Cause you're dumb that's why!

So my mom is buying tickets to fly out from CONNECTICUT to CALIFORNIA! ALL the way across the country! To say good-bye to her father and apologize(for what I don't know....She is not guilty of ANYTHING...THEY should be apologizing to HER...).

Honestly, if it were me I wouldn't accept the apology.

Why wait until you are on death's door to finally say sorry or whatever...a lot of good that really does. You've had YEARS and YEARS to apologize and be the "big man" but doing it at the end is just cowardly...You apparently weren't worried about being judged by God before...so don't start now.

I must sound heartless, but ya know? I really don't care. I don't know this man. I don't know his 2nd wife...All I do know is the flaming witch has kept me from meeting my grandfather at an age I would actually be able to remember what he looks like and any conversation we had...But no. I will NEVER get to know what he was like.

Cowards...the both of them...and one day I WILL meet face to face with the flaming witch and have at it...I'm sick of how she hurts my mother. Sick of how she will NOT allow my part of the family to visit. My aunt is already in California, but did the witch object? NOPE! She's on my "list"...you don't want to be on my "list"...

[bay_blnd jmpr07]

And me struggling with depression is probably not helping how I feel about this. It's probably making me angrier then I should be.

My relative is dying and I don't care...Because I was never allowed to care about him...Because I was never allowed to meet him...

[HJ_lilbit]

I'm very sorry. Sounds like a crazy situation. I wish you and your grandfather the best.

[ches]

Remember that you only know one side of the story.

Is your mom going alone? It sounds like you should/want to go too to meet your grandpa before he passes.

It's not quite the same thing, but my hubby's grandpa passed just before Thanksgiving and I never got to meet him. The family had mixed feelings about his passing as he was a terrible father, used to beat my MIL when she was a teenager, etc. But when he died he left all his money to his kids (not his partner) and I guess the family had made their peace. I would've liked to have met the man, but he died kinda suddenly as he hid his illness from his family until it was too late.

You can't change the past, what matters is how you handle the present and the future. Your mom probably wants to make peace with her dad before he passes and that's admirable. You're entitled to feel however you do, but please don't judge your mom; she is going through some difficult emotions right now and I'm sure she'd appreciate your support.

[bay_blnd jmpr07]

Not judging my mom...just them...

They've done wrong by my whole family(all 5 members of us in CT).

[JumpsxGlory]

I'm so sorry, it seems like a very stressful confusing situation also...

I know how you feel though. When my grandpa died, who I barely knew or every saw, I didn't feel much but I did find myself crying and I still don't know why. Sadness I guess for his death (any death is bad but he was part of my family even though I never saw him), and maybe never knowing him? Who knows... Both my grandma and grandpa weren't kind to my family much like yours, they hated my mom as well as my older brother.

I was also suffering from depression at the time.

If you need anyone to talk to about anything, feel free to PM me. The mail box is always open. lol.

[ches]

Originally Posted by bay_blnd jmpr07

Not judging my mom...just them...

They've done wrong by my whole family(all 5 members of us in CT).

I guess "judge" was the wrong word, sorry. I'm sorry you got caught up in something that happened a generation before you. Is there any chance you can go with your mom?

[bay_blnd jmpr07]

Originally Posted by ches

I guess "judge" was the wrong word, sorry. I'm sorry you got caught up in something that happened a generation before you. Is there any chance you can go with your mom?

Nope. I start a new semester at school Monday(4 day weekend for me ) and she's not leaving until Tuesday and getting back Saturday. I also have work which I CAN'T miss because my boss is still recovering from cancer surgery and has had to take a step back in recovery.

If I went there would be a verbal fight anyways.