[bnttyra]

Originally Posted by canadianlover

tell her if she wants to breed the mare then the mare will need to leave your property- simple as that

Again, they can not afford to build a pen or stall or finish fencing off their property which is right next door. Plus, I don't want to cause a riff in the family!

[imacowgirl2]

Originally Posted by bnttyra

While this is a great idea, the thing is we don't breed to outside mares and have made a commitment to only breed 1 of our own mares per year if that, depending on the market and if we feel the mare we choose is ready, if any of that makes sense. So there is no contract and she knows that.

I think she is well aware of the costs involved since they did attempt to breed this mare several years ago, AI that didn't take. I think that she believes that she will be able to get one cheap, no stud fee and I know that she would not spend any money on the vet care for the mare, she doesn't now. So she is thinking, basically no cost at least she wouldn't spend any money.

I may put some stuff down on paper anyway, just to maybe get her attention as to what it may cost US.

There ya go right there Her mare isn't yours, therefore it is an outside mare, and you dont breed to outside mares

[Heavenly Jumper]

Have her look at this -

Should I breed my mare?

If you can answer yes to these questions, then yes. Go for it because you know the risks and you are ready.

Does my mare represent a good example of the breed?

Is she free of major conformation and temperament flaws?

Do you know whether or not she has any genetic flaws that she could pass on?

Do I have the knowledge to choose a stallion who will compliment her?

Will the resulting foal be bettering the breed?

Do I want to have my mare pregnant and out of work?

Do I have the facilities to have a foal born safely?

Do I have the financial means to pay for:
Stud Fees AND mare care
Feed and Supplements for my mare AND foal
The many standard veterinary bills during the pregnancy
Unexpected emergency vet bills
The costs of raising that foal to ride-able age (feed, vet, farrier)
The costs of training for the foal
Do I have 3-4 years to wait for the foal to be born and grow to trainable/ride-able age?

Am I prepared to risk my mares death?

In the event that she dies or rejects the foal, do I have the knowledge and means to care for the orphaned foal?

Am I prepared to risk losing the foal AND all the money I spent up until that point?

Am I prepared to risk losing them both?

Am I experienced in handling and training a young foal?

Do I have a plan for the foal if I can no longer care for it properly?

Do I have an intended purpose for the resulting foal?

After all this, am I willing to risk that the foal doesn't live up to my expectations?

My point is this: Look at the list above, they are the realistic responsibilities of breeding. If you said no to some of them, then you are better off saving the money, possible heartache, or whatever it is that turned you off from breeding and buy the horse that you want. I am not being mean or rude, just showing plainly things that need to be considered when lives are being created.

[bnttyra]

^^^ I agree with you completely on this! The problem is that so many of the above questions she really won't think about. She does think her mare is a good quality mare, not saying she isn't, but she does have the whole possiblity of club foot that can be passed on. The financial issue is really the big one for me, since we would end up having to do everything and pay for much of the associated expenses. She is **** bent on breeding and I don't want to! That is why I am trying to find some nice way of telling her such. Yes it is my stallion and I can simply say no but I know that I would hurt her feelings and I don't want to do that. I guess I am just being a chicken and need to just tell her it is not a good idea for all the above reasons and tell her that we will not take on the additional financial burden. I can only hope that she will not get upset with me.

[haunani]

If she does get upset with you, oh well. It's nice to be able to do things without hurting people's feelings, but there are times where we just have to come out and blunty tell them how it is and/or how it will be. If they don't like it, tough cookies!

[bnttyra]

I was really hoping someone would have a creative way of telling her no without upsetting her! I may just have to bite the bullet and do it! I still like the idea of not being able to breed because he is in training, at the trainers!!

[haunani]

Originally Posted by bnttyra

I still like the idea of not being able to breed because he is in training, at the trainers!!

Then you still run the risk of her finding a different, cheap stud to use. I really think it would be better to use the approach of YOU not being able to afford to feed another one of HER horses.

[bnttyra]

Just thought I would show you what I think her answers to these questions would be, and you guys can tell me how you would respond.


Does my mare represent a good example of the breed? Yes, I think so.

Is she free of major conformation and temperament flaws? No, but that is why I am breeding to the stallion available

Do you know whether or not she has any genetic flaws that she could pass on? Maybe club foot but that could be the way she was trimmed early in her life.

Do I have the knowledge to choose a stallion who will compliment her?
No need, the stallion is my nephews.

Will the resulting foal be bettering the breed? Yes

Do I want to have my mare pregnant and out of work?Yes, she is not being used right now anyway

Do I have the facilities to have a foal born safely? Yes, my nephews.

have the financial means to pay for:
Stud Fees AND mare care No need, family owns the stud
Supplements for my mare AND foal Yes
The many standard veterinary bills during the pregnancy No, will do ourselves
Unexpected emergency vet bills No
The costs of raising that foal to ride-able age (feed, vet, farrier) Maybe if I get the better paying job
The costs of training for the foal No, my granddaughter or niece will do
Do I have 3-4 years to wait for the foal to be born and grow to trainable/ride-able age? yes

Am I prepared to risk my mares death? Yes

In the event that she dies or rejects the foal, do I have the knowledge and means to care for the orphaned foal? No, but my niece does.

Am I prepared to risk losing the foal AND all the money I spent up until that point? Yes, cause no money involved in the actual breeding

Am I prepared to risk losing them both? Yes

Am I experienced in handling and training a young foal?Some but I have my niece and granddaughter to help

Do I have a plan for the foal if I can no longer care for it properly? Daughter, granddaughter or niece will probably take

Do I have an intended purpose for the resulting foal? Not really, just would like another horse and would like to breed my mare.

I have been talking with her quite abit about this and have been trying to get her to re-think it. It seems that for every reason I have to not do it, she comes up with some excuse. I keep hoping that she will get the hint that I don't think it is a good idea.

[bnttyra]

Originally Posted by haunani

Then you still run the risk of her finding a different, cheap stud to use. I really think it would be better to use the approach of YOU not being able to afford to feed another one of HER horses.

I doubt it since the only reason she is even wanting to breed the mare is because we own the stallion. I agree that it should be my approach on the whole feeding her horses but she does give me $60 every 4 months and does give the mare extra stuff daily(pellets and pays for the farrier). Plus we use her horsetrailer to haul and store the hay in until our barn is done. Not to mention that they do help watch the kids once in awhile. So while she does give us somethings, she pays no boarding and the cash she gives is no where close to what it costs to buy the hay and I have paid for the dewormer and shots for the mare for the last 2 years. It is just a crappy position to be in

[windwalker]

It doesn't seem to me that she really WANTs a foal.I mean,what does she want to do with it in the future? Does she have plan's to show it? Is she just going to breed her mare and put all the expenses and training on you?
From what i've gathered so far in this thread is that she doesn't really really want a foal (if she did she would buy a well-bred foal which would end up being LESS than breeding her mare),she just want's to breed her mare for some reason.I get how hard it is to say no to family,but with something as big and serious as this,sometime's you have to be the b***h and put your foot down and just say no.It's your stallion.I'm sorry if i sound harsh,i don't mean to,but it really just seems to me that she's going to breed her mare to your stallion,put ALL of the expenses on you and your family,and expect you to do everything.Sorry if i'm wrong or misunderstood you,but i think there's no way around it.You just have to man-up and put your foot down.That's all of the advice i've got,sorry.