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Author
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Topic: HELP!!!!!!
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Star_chablis
Member
Member # 223
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posted December 01, 2003 01:34 PM
OK i train a 12 year old girl that ive known forever to ride. she pays lease for the month and is lucky if she rides about an hour of that month. It sounds harsh but she has no balance, cant stand horse slober, wont put a bit in, is afraid of everything, is always saying i cant no matter how many times i show/help/do it with her. And shes extremly spoiled.i may be a bit biased given the fact that i had to work my way to everything i waited 10 years till i got my first saddle! now her parents are buying her riding clothes (wrong kind mind you) and her dad wants to buy her a horse and have me train it! i would have no problem training another horse but she is NOWHERE ready for one (shes ridden a total of about 4 hours of her life and is just now getting down how to move with the horse). I wouldnt however want any horse to become a feild decoration and me thrown to the side when shes bored with it. Her dad also refuses to learn anything about horses. I have talked and talked to them telling them thelong hours, hard work, and sweat that comes along with riding but they say 'we know we want to ride though,besides we have you' Mind you im 14 so its very hard.
They also want her to SHOW!!!! i really dont know what to do. My only problem is id never want some poor unsuspecting horse to be treated badly because of a unexperianced rider/handler PLEASE HELP
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Horse, Thou Fliest with out wings.
Posts: 112 | From: USA | Registered: May 2003
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QHlover
Member
Member # 226
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posted December 01, 2003 01:42 PM
Just tell them the truth. You might lose a customer but come on, you sound like you wouldn't mind. She sounds like a s***. I would pull my hair out.
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"Do what you have to do to get the job done. Be as gentle as possible but as firm as necessary." -Clinton Anderson
Posts: 260 | Registered: May 2003
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Blistering Winds
Member
Member # 843
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posted December 01, 2003 01:57 PM
Tell him you don't have the time. Don't forget you have your own life you have to deal with as well. If he starts talking about buying a horse for her, tell him that she really should show open shows before they go spend the money on a horse. Tell him that she needs to find the area that she excells in first before spending the money in a trained or even to train a horse in an event she won't enjoy. Since she leases the horse, maybe next season, you can help her "prepare" for any of the little open shows around your area. Maybe talk to the horse owner that she leases from about allowing her to show him in the open shows since there is less regulations on who rides what horse.
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Horses should not be treated as people. They should be respected for who they are and what they are capable of doing!
Born Free Now Expensive
Posts: 4337 | From: Texas | Registered: Oct 2003
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RiverMountainLady
Member
Member # 1029
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posted December 01, 2003 02:50 PM
Yeah, I agree. Tell the parents to truth..tell them that first off, their daughter needs to strongly get the basics down if she wants to be able to ride her own horse. And secondly, she needs to understand and undertake the responsibility that comes with having your own horse. You could also tell them that you don't have the time. I hope it works out well for you.
Posts: 110 | From: Mass. | Registered: Nov 2003
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TxnGoneHorseCrazy
Member
Member # 580
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posted December 01, 2003 02:59 PM
My advice is to tell everyone what you just told us. If you dont tell them, they might actually get a horse for her. That would be awefull for the horse.
Posts: 98 | From: Texas | Registered: Aug 2003
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Dawn
Member
Member # 14
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posted December 01, 2003 03:09 PM
Also, if I'm working with a person, especially a child as they're more likely to take advantage of you like that, don't do it for them. If you're teaching them something, demonstrate once. Then they do it. If they won't put the bridle on, they simply don't ride.
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Heard in the midst of a handwriting exam ~ "And to think, we could've been bio-chem majors."
Posts: 6885 | From: Tennessee | Registered: Nov 2002
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Blistering Winds
Member
Member # 843
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posted December 01, 2003 03:12 PM
Definitly agree. At 12, they can easily learn to bridle and saddle a horse. I see it all the time at shows. The small 12 yr olds need help putting the saddle up, but they do the rest!
If she complains to her parents, oh well. All part of training. Most trainers that they will come across are like that and even WORSE.
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Horses should not be treated as people. They should be respected for who they are and what they are capable of doing!
Born Free Now Expensive
Posts: 4337 | From: Texas | Registered: Oct 2003
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Star_chablis
Member
Member # 223
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posted December 01, 2003 03:35 PM
i would 'just loose a customer' if i werent so paranoid about how they would treat a horse if they got one ![[Flaming Mad]](graemlins/flamingmad.gif) .
i have also told her parents EVERYTHING i told you and theyre even more juvilielle then their daughter
as for shows theres no way whatsoever she could show as sad as it is she is quite easily the worst rider ive ever seen **feels bad ![[Frown]](frown.gif) **
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Horse, Thou Fliest with out wings.
Posts: 112 | From: USA | Registered: May 2003
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Blistering Winds
Member
Member # 843
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posted December 01, 2003 03:40 PM
Let her show. Might jar her family into reality. She'll make a fool out of herself and she'll find out why. So will her parents.
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Horses should not be treated as people. They should be respected for who they are and what they are capable of doing!
Born Free Now Expensive
Posts: 4337 | From: Texas | Registered: Oct 2003
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RiverMountainLady
Member
Member # 1029
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posted December 01, 2003 03:41 PM
Aww..sounds like you're in a tough situation..well. I guess the best advice would be just to tell the truth, and maybe not be as lenient with the girl and her parents. You're her teacher, make her listen to you and make her do the things required to show/own a horse.
Posts: 110 | From: Mass. | Registered: Nov 2003
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Catapultcomformation
Member
Member # 827
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posted December 01, 2003 05:00 PM
ahh but if you let her show and she makes a fool out of herself then they might bring it down on you.
As for the bit thing ask the kid a Q' that can not be refused the kind that is not asked it is commanded dont say it to harshly just say that ist part of horses it comes with the deal the kid not to hard mind you but ya know tell her something like I can not keep doing this for you It is your responsibility
Tell her parents that you refuse to have this tell them that if they keep on getting pamperd like this she will not learn and if she needs something then it should be given to her but not without progress I would ask for more time with the girl.
have the parents watch a lesson that is given before with a girl her age or younger that s good at that type of thing and say to the parents hey you know so and so could be that way and say something like but it will take alot of work . DO NOT let them buy A horse I repeat DO NOT tel them that she needs to progress more before that can happen and tht to do that more frequent lessons are a must even lower the price a bit so they dont think they are being scammed.
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;)Anna ;)
jumping is like being set off in a catapult you dont know quite the extent of your stupidity until its over, and by that time your already in the ER
Posts: 570 | From: USA alabama | Registered: Oct 2003
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Star_chablis
Member
Member # 223
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posted December 01, 2003 06:01 PM
oo thats another thing if they watch lessons its 'can she gallop' 'can you jump that fence over there' ; i can ride better' 'lets race i can beat you!' yes this is sadly from a 35 yr old man and hes dead serious. The problem is shes riding a fat old arab pony whos never done anything but barrelracing and its not my pony so i dont know how i would do that ![[Mad]](mad.gif)
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Horse, Thou Fliest with out wings.
Posts: 112 | From: USA | Registered: May 2003
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Dawn
Member
Member # 14
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posted December 01, 2003 06:03 PM
Is this all taking place at your barn or a boarding barn, or what?
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Heard in the midst of a handwriting exam ~ "And to think, we could've been bio-chem majors."
Posts: 6885 | From: Tennessee | Registered: Nov 2002
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Star_chablis
Member
Member # 223
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posted December 01, 2003 07:29 PM
well ive been at a harness racing barn that also has a couple riding ponys (mostly speed events) and the lil arab (and diesel of course) so i gove lessons to her and a couple other girls
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Horse, Thou Fliest with out wings.
Posts: 112 | From: USA | Registered: May 2003
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Dawn
Member
Member # 14
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posted December 01, 2003 07:32 PM
Have you had an adult instructor at the barn observe her? Then maybe they could express their concern to the parents.
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Heard in the midst of a handwriting exam ~ "And to think, we could've been bio-chem majors."
Posts: 6885 | From: Tennessee | Registered: Nov 2002
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Sandra-A1
Member
Member # 588
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posted December 01, 2003 08:07 PM
Honestly I would go to the parents and I would hand them a list of professional trainers who train horses and riders for the shows.
I have seen kids (and parents) like this and honestly you don't need the headache! Send then to a big name Pro Trainer and let him deal with them. You will never be able to please them and you will be the one blamed for their daughter's lack of success at the shows.
I would tell them no thanks and since they want their daughter to show they need to check out the professionals on your list.
Wish them & their daughter every success and walk away!
If you are just starting out in the Instructing & Training business you need clients who want to work hard, learn and win. Once you are well established and have earned your reputation as one of the "names" in your area, you can have a couple of clients like this but until then I would not waste my time and effort...no matter what they are paying you it's not enough or worth it.
As always ..JMHO... ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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"It is our choices Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."
-Dumbledore
Posts: 1863 | From: Alabama | Registered: Aug 2003
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hApPiNeSs
Member
Member # 1082
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posted December 02, 2003 04:54 AM
just one question.
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winner of the prettiest pony competition 2004!!!
www.freewebs.com/happy_the_horse
Posts: 475 | From: cornwall | Registered: Nov 2003
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hApPiNeSs
Member
Member # 1082
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posted December 02, 2003 04:58 AM
just one question. why does this girl want to ride when she is so obviously scard of it? i trained my 2 cusins on their beginner pony, who is a saint. the girl got right into it and was really good, so i train her evry saturday and sunday, for nothing. as for the other one, well, i am so not riding with him anymore! he thought it was hilarious to pull the pony in the mouth and when jumping he insisted that the proper way to jump was to sit back and let the horse pull you over with the reins. his dad laughed every time he stated this behaviour, and when i wasnot looking, rode this 11hh pony . hes 200lb and is 6 foot for goodness sake! i know exactly how you feel, its so frustrating!
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winner of the prettiest pony competition 2004!!!
www.freewebs.com/happy_the_horse
Posts: 475 | From: cornwall | Registered: Nov 2003
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Star_chablis
Member
Member # 223
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posted December 02, 2003 03:31 PM
its not so much her being afraid its not wanting to get her hands dirty nd we all know u have to! XD i would walk away but ive known this girl all her life so its kind of hard. and im the only 'trainer' at my barn ![[Pony]](graemlins/pony.gif)
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Horse, Thou Fliest with out wings.
Posts: 112 | From: USA | Registered: May 2003
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